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Time again (finally) for another edition of Clipart FAIL! Back by demand, I should say. One of the biggest Clipart FAIL fans, John Keats of “Breaking the Ice” offered the subject of baseball for the next posting, so here it is John! Baseball, in the dead of summer. And it’s friggin HOT where I am.

Also, another new friend of mine offered some help in this edition of Clipart FAIL. He was also the winner of the last PWITM Caption Contest, our new wordy-yet-hilarious regular commenter “derelict”! Via email we have gotten to know each other better and his way with words (especially those pesky big ones you had to learn in Vocabulary Workshop books) made me think he’d be perfect for.. well.. making fun of clipart! Hope you enjoy his comments, I sure did!

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Is it rabbit season or duck season?  I don’t know, let me kick this ball at my head.

FAIL.

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It’s probably a troll, though it may be an ogre.  Either way, it’s not wearing any pants.  Which makes me VERY glad for the positioning of the glove…

FAIL.

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OK.  I get the shop apron, kinda.  The tights are strange, but whatever.  I can even forgive the bucket.  But why is he wearing a rotisserie chicken on his left hand?

FAIL.

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In the parts of the world where it is illegal for cyclops women to play baseball, the punishment is often death by dismemberment, as depicted here.  Unfortunately, the same fate does not await the person who drew this.

FAIL.

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Remember kids:  Every time Ryan Howard hits a home run, a baby chick dies a horrible death.  Now who wants to play some hockey?

FAIL.

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Thumb: And furthermore…
Other fingers: Why do we have our own hands, when we are part of a hand?  Do our hands also have hands?  Where does it end?

… It ends right here.  At:

FAIL.

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Oh dear God I hope that’s his hand…

FAIL.

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It appears this man is brushing his teeth with a banana.  But why?

FAIL.

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This “baseball player” seems to be emerging from another dimension as he tries desperately to lick his eyeball.  I’m not sure what he’s trying to do with the bat, but perhaps we’re all better off with a little mystery in our lives.

FAIL.

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What is this I don’t even… Is he wearing an oven mitt?  Is his jaw even connected to the rest of his face?  Is that a moth-eaten handkerchief giving birth to the moon above his head?   WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?

FAIL.

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Answer: The ears.  The question?  What is the only part of this picture that doesn’t look like it was drawn by an intoxicated toddler?

FAIL.